It’s all standing right in front of me

like my custom stole sits in my room. 

Waiting.

So close,

But so far. 

My mind twirls in shapes and colors trying to make sense of it all.

Adulthood. 

The close of one chapter that almost swallowed me whole. 

The friends I’ve made cheer me on from the finish line.

So much hope.

So much growth.

Wrapped into four short years.

All of the times that I believed I wasn’t good enough.

The failed classes.

The semester I took off to improve my mental health.

They sit in the crevices of my mind.

They once defined me 

Or so I thought.

Feeling stupid in class compared to my classmates,

But still showing up every class trying to learn.

Studying countless hours for one test. 

Canceling plans for an assignment I forgot was due instead.

Late nights staring at a screen,

wondering if I would ever catch up.

There were moments I wanted to quit.
Moments I questioned if I even belonged here.

But I stayed.

Not perfectly.
Not gracefully.
But I stayed.

And maybe that’s what no one talks about.

That success doesn’t always look like straight A’s or confidence.
Sometimes it looks like showing up when you feel behind.

Like trying again when your mind refuses to sit still.
Like taking twice as long to reach the same place.

But arriving anyway.

And now that stole still sits in my room.
Quiet.
Patient.

Waiting for the girl who almost gave up
but didn’t.

One month from graduation.

And the girl who once felt so far behind
is finally crossing the finish line.